G2D2: Round 1-The Parkwood

Solerno Blood Orange Liqueur, Old Forester Classic Bourbon, lemon wedges, mint.
Solerno Blood Orange Liqueur, Old Forester Classic Bourbon, lemon wedges, mint.

Found this little gem at a joint called “The Hill” here in the wilds of Wichita. A tasty little libation, but with just a little umph’ behind it…like the kick of a geriatric mule. I feel like it is the drink of a charmingly evil, southern gentleman enjoys as he plots to defame the town’s do-gooder sheriff.  I am also pretty sure Joe Don Baker probably drinks A LOT of these.

He stole that cat from his neighbor after his fifth Parkwood.
He stole that cat from his neighbor after his fifth Parkwood.

The next question is what film would I watch as I drink this beauty? Obviously it would be Mitchell, but that is the easy answer. In the land of Gonzo Guys, we don’t do easy…we do odd.

The Gonzo answer is without a shadow of a doubt is…

“Hanzo the Razor: Who’s Got the Gold?”

Hanzo will probably have the gold by the end.
Hanzo will probably have the gold by the end.

If you haven’t seen this gem from Japan, you are missing out. One of a series of samurai detective stories, the movies are all pretty good little mystery-action mash ups…with one twist. Hanzo tortures his man parts regularly to become the ultimate lover to aid in him gaining information from women. Basically he pours hot and cold water over his junk and then he bangs a burlap sack of rice. He also has a seductive rustic hot tub with a hidden pokey weapons panel. I need to stress that the plots and most aspects of these movies are quite good even without the weird schwantz torture. Now back to how The Parkwood made me think of this movie. Basically it is a sophisticated drink that has a bite and twist to it. Hanzo the Razor is a sophisticated film with a dongy twist. Also appropriate is the inclusion of blood orange liqueur as Hanzo spills a lot of blood with this kick ass spiked ball chain thing. I see my glass is now empty, better order round 2.