Tag Archives: phartus maximus

Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – Phartus Exhaustus And Classifications

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PHARTUS EXHAUSTUS

This variety, commonly known as the Running, Jumping, or Jogging Fart, is encountered at athletic events, track meets, boxing matches, in the park or at the Olympics. It is usually of the phartus maximus variety. It may resemble orange juice or breakfast cereals in order. Continue reading Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – Phartus Exhaustus And Classifications

Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – Phartus Precipitous, Infantus, McPhartus, Popcornus, and Fowlfetus

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PHARTUS PRECIPITOUS

This is the famous Dripping Fart and is usually a very alarming experience for the producer. The producer may assume, and generally correctly, that he has produced something different than he had intended. Phartus precipitous is usually followed by a quick trip to the bathroom for checking. Usually a change of underwear is in order. There is no way know at the present time to avoid or predict
the occurrence of the phartus precitpitous. Continue reading Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – Phartus Precipitous, Infantus, McPhartus, Popcornus, and Fowlfetus

Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – Phartus Communicus, Irritus, and Aqueous

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PHARTUS COMMUNICUS

Phartus communicus, or the Telephone Fart as it is commonly called, is usually produced during telephone conversations. It may occur while dialing, or while waiting for an answer on the other end of the line, but more often is experienced during the actual conversation. Continue reading Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – Phartus Communicus, Irritus, and Aqueous

Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – The Stationary Fart (Pharticus Staticus)

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The following are the most common varieties of the stationary fart. The list has been compiled from years of research and study and does not, in fact, contain each and every possible variety. It does, however, contain the most often reported types and is therefore as usable a reference as is available at this time. Continue reading Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – The Stationary Fart (Pharticus Staticus)

Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – Phartus Minimus, Phartus, And Maximus

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Phartus Minimus

This is more commonly know as the lightweight or Mini Fart. It is usually identified by its short duration and low noise level. Hoerver, this particular variety should not be confused with the Silent But Deadly variety (see phartus anonymous). Continue reading Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – Phartus Minimus, Phartus, And Maximus

Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – The Family

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Farts (family Phartus) can be divided by their basic characteristics into two major sub-families: your farts and the farts of someone else.  These two sub-families are definite and do not overlap.  Even the most novice of fart students can usually tell into which of these two sub-families all farts will fall. Continue reading Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – The Family