Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – Note

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NOTE:

It should be noted that the phartus domesticus, or Housewife Fart, is oderless. No wives produce any farts that smell. This is a well know n fact and should be here noted. However, it should be noted that divorced women will occasionally produce what is known as the phartus domesticus separatus. This variety will have an odor. Also, women who have been married twice have known to produce the phartus domesticus II version. This variety, too, has an odor. Continue reading Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – Note

Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – Phartus Interruptus and Phartus Whisperus

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PHARTUS INTERRUPTUS

The Parted Fart, as it is commonly known, is a special category and will fall into one of the five broad classifications above.  This strange phenomenon occurs when a fart is produced in two or more short bursts, each appearing to be individual and separate.  This may indeed be the case.

Continue reading Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – Phartus Interruptus and Phartus Whisperus

Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – Phartus Extremis And Phartus Anonymous

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PHARTUS EXTREMIS

The Super Fart as it is commonly know, phartus extremis is easily audible even at distances approaching 25 feet.  Phartus extremis will not support human or animal life and should not be produced in confined areas or near heat or flame.  Insects in close proximity are usually asphyxiated and some damage to foliage has been reported on occasion. Continue reading Uncle Mike’s Original Fart Book – Phartus Extremis And Phartus Anonymous